sexual anxiety

how do i communicate my wants and desires during sex?
do i know what these are?
what are the barriers towards me communicating these?
do i know why this is happening to me?
do i know when this is happening to me?
how does all this make me feel?

these are some of the questions that may go through are heads during sex, but also before we’ve even got through the door (or maybe, before this, when we’re out on a date even). understanding what happens to us and when can help us unlock some of our defences and look at what it means to be vulnerable during sex.

ask yourself, do i actually talk about what i want, what we want, during sex?

I like this article by Abi O’Donovan as it shows honestly how our histories can play out in new encounters, and how being vulnerable can be a path to greater understanding and meeting.