what is psychosexual therapy? and how might i work with someone in a psychosexual way?
often, when talking about sex, we lack the language and the confidence to exactly describe what it is that is not working for us or blocking us. there can be so much taboo and shame around sex and the acts of sex that we then unconsciously (and consciously) may internalise some of this shame; avoidance of talking about it will seem like the best strategy. or sometimes, we are just unsure, scared, but know that when it comes to sex, things are not working for us.
the majority of us are taught about the biological function of sex, and subsequently we may learn through further experiences in adulthood what our adult sexuality may mean for us (and this, of course, may also change over time). what would it be like to to allow ourselves to explore our bodies and desires outside of this biological narrative? additionally, if we allow ourselves to view our sexuality as a core aspect of our identity, and give some time and care for this, what would this look like, and how can we do this?
my job in psychosexual therapy is to start to unpick sex, finding the right language for you, to give some names to feelings and actions, to try and take away the shameful power around sex that can exist, and drawing from sex and relationship psychologies find some interventions and techniques that might work for you.
i may work with you around your sexual relationship history to try and build a coherent narrative and find the blocking points for you.
i may give you some homework exercises for you to do to try and reconnect with your body, your partner(s), your sexuality.
it is important to note that i am not here to medically diagnose, and i may recommend that clients get checked out by a physician if needed.
the following is a list of topics that i might work with clients on. i work with clients from all sexuality and gender presentations.
- problems around arousal
- sexual intimacy
- issues around penetration
- issues with erections and ejaculations : impotency, premature/delayed ejaculations
- when sex is too painful: vaginismus / anodyspareunia (painful receptive sex)
- relationship construction
- gender identity / expression
- sexual identity / expression
- issues around sexual compulsivity (‘sex addiction’, though this term is controversial and pathologising) and risky sexual behaviours
- issues around sexual violence and abuse